Broken... Heart

For over two weeks now Anabelle has talked about the Christmas present she's been working on at school for me and Mike. Her teacher even sent a note home in the newsletter talking about how hard each of the children in her class had been working on this gift and how much it meant to each of them.

Today was the day Anabelle brought it home. Wrapped in a decorated paper bag, she told me how excited she was for Daddy and I to open the special present tonight (so we could put it on the tree before Christmas) and explained that she wanted us to keep it forever and ever and ever. 

I teared up a little as she talked about how hard and long she had worked on it and my heart swelled at the thought of having something so special. She even had me call Mike in the car on the way home so she could leave him a voice mail telling him about how there would be a surprise on the counter when he got home.

We arrived home and it was the same routine... try and balance getting the girls in the door, coats and shoes off, backpacks put away, dinner started, etc. I was trying hard to get dinner done quickly as possible, as Emilia was following me around crying because she was so hungry. She actually bit the back of my leg because I wouldn't pick her up while I was cooking.

As I was balancing her and all the stuff on the counter, the bag with Anabelle's gift slipped off the edge of the island. I immediately heard a crunch and my heart sank. I ran over to the bag, picked it up and called Anabelle into the kitchen. I asked her if the present was something breakable and instantly you could see her connect the dots. With her big brown eyes filling with tears she asked point blank if I had broken the present. I explained that the bag had accidentily fallen off of the counter and she instantly started crying.

We tore open the gift and found this...

In a matter of seconds Anabelle was hysterical. To my surprise, I was almost equally hysterical. My mind was racing. How can we fix this?  What can I do?

We called Mike and apparently between my sobs he thought I had said, "I dropped Emi" instead of, "I dropped the ornament." Once he finally understood he asked me to calm down then asked to talk to Anabelle. Whatever he said to her seemed to work because Ana settled down and by the time he walked in the door we had pulled ourselves together enough to be eating dinner. 

Unfortunately it was only a matter of time before I was crying again when we pulled out the cards that accompanied the gift...

We told Anabelle that when we get home from traveling over the holiday we will make a new ornament that will be just as special because we made it together. She seemed to be OK with that. I also think she was so surprised by how upset I got, that she understood that I really knew how special it was to her.

It's now 9:30 at night and I'm still a little emotional about it. I feel so horrible for not putting the gift up somewhere high or taking my time to be more careful. I hope Anabelle has forgiven me and we can make a new special memory from this. I'm sure over time, as with anything else, it won't seem as monumental of an event. But wow, I've never felt so bad about something in my life.